Michael White

Very few things crystallize the minds of a person better than tragedy, loss or grief. This weekend, my dad was admitted to the hospital with what started out as back pain and became a serious issue relating to his heart. He’s ok (thanks for asking), but on Monday night, I sat on my porch and pondered the value of my relationship with him and how much of who we are as believers and people in general is directly related to the people we spend the most or most definitive time around.

My parents divorced when i was 2.5 so I have no memories of us being a family, eating dinner together, or opening presents. What I do remember is the time I had with both parents, their love and their devotion to me. And that is what counts more than any thing else.

One moment defines my dad and I….it goes back to 1994…

I was a senior in high school, and my dad and i had gotten into a semi-physical altercation. As i lay on my stomach with his knee in my back he asked me very sternly..

‘Mikee….what do u want from me?’

My response to him….’I want u to be there like every other dad…i want to look in the stands and see u cheering me on…rooting for me….’

My father’s response was the defining moment…He said…’

‘do u remember that game against MUS (local prep school), when they threw the touchdown over your head (I was playing safety) to win the game…[i said yes]…he went on…’i was there…i saw it…i was there… since you got here, i havent missed a game, i’ve cheered you on…i’ve watched you play…i’ve been your biggest fan’…..

My response..’so why didnt i see u’

His response….’b/c i didnt want u to put more pressure on yourself b/c i was there…i wanted u to enjoy the game…not perform to make me happy…i was proud of u, before u played…i was proud of u while u hurt for losing the game..and i’m proud of u….b/c i’m your dad….

In life friends, we get moments that define not only who we are but what we are. That moment of clarity helped to do more than define our relationship, it also defined who i am today…we can live life with cheerleaders…or with people on our team….my dad chose to join my team….b/c he knew that cheerleading was for the sidelines! Loveya Dad!

Survive and Thrive